French is Funny

Last Friday I took a French placement test at my university.  I managed to fake my way through most of the test using my limited knowledge of French and my less-limited knowledge of Spanish.  (Lucky for me the entire test was multiple choice.)

Unfortunately, the professor made a huge deal at the beginning about only answering questions we really knew.  Otherwise we might end up in a French class that is above our skill level and you are not allowed to change classes.

Consequently, I was taking this placement test very seriously.  Which is embarrassing because it's a placement test.  By definition a placement test is "a test usually given to a student upon entering an educational institution to determine a specific knowledge or proficiency in various subjects for the purpose of assignment to appropriate courses or classes."*

You're not supposed to stress about placement tests, you're just supposed to answer questions you know.

But I was really worried about whether or not I really knew the answer.  Every question started with me reading the question, deciding on the answer I was pretty sure was right, a 30 second debate on whether I had learned that from a podcast or whether I was guessing, followed by a lot of silent laughing.

I mean, I was cracking myself up!  Who spends that much time thinking about each question on a PLACEMENT TEST?

Oh right.  Me.

Anyway, I was doing a pretty good job holding in my laughter until question #46.  It was a question about elves.  I don't know why anyone would ever need to know how to say this in French, but they wanted to know the correct way to write 'There are a million elves in the classroom.'  But all I could think was "What the heck are a million elves doing in a classroom?"

I left this question blank.

Today the elves came back.  I was working on a French homework assignment (that turned out to not actually be a homework assignment) when I came across the elves again.

However, it turns out that élève does not actually mean elf.  It means student.

Which clears up a lot of questions.

Except, of course, WHAT THE HECK ARE A MILLION STUDENTS DOING IN A CLASSROOM?

The world may never know.

But only because I can't remember what French word I thought meant a million.  It probably means something stupid-and-not-at-all-Lord-of-the-Rings, too.

*http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/placement%20test