Hi, What's Your Major?

Being in college I get this question a lot. . . like at least once a day.  And I’ve started to notice a trend here.

Someone says “journalism” and you respond, “Oh, are you hoping to be the next Katie Couric?”

Or, if someone says any of the engineering majors you say, “Wow, that sounds really hard, you must be so smart.  Plus, you’ll never have to worry about job opportunities.”

Or, maybe you get someone artsy and they say, “Oh, I’m a theater major” and you go, “Wow, that sounds so fun!  I wish I was good at acting.”

But when someone asks me my major and I respond, “math” (or mathematics if I’m trying to sound especially smart) they just look at me.  And after a few minutes of contemplation they say, “Math, huh?  So, then do you like want to be a math teacher?”

And it doesn’t matter how I respond at this point because they are now comparing me to all of their past math teachers - their 3rd grade teacher who gave them a “Needs Improvement” on their report card, their 7th grade teacher who started class by saying they would have homework every day, their sophomore geometry teacher who used words that didn’t make any sense like sine (also spelled “sin”, which is really what math is), tangent (what the freak does that even mean?) and slope (y/x or x/y?)  And then finally they make it to their senior year teacher who realized that they had all already given up and decided to give up too.

And then they look back at me (not even realizing I said I have no intention of being a math teacher) and say, “Well, cool.  I hate math.”  And then we awkwardly stand there looking at each other before they say, “Well, I gotta go, but have fun, ya know, doing math problems and stuff.”

But that’s cool, because if someone can’t appreciate the joy I get out of spending my Friday nights practicing derivatives and integrals then quite frankly my dear, I don’t give a d***. 

So here’s my advice for those of you who don’t know how to respond when someone says they’re a math major.  All you have to do is say, “Wow I’m sorry, but it’s cool that you actually enjoy math.”

Because we all understand we’re crazy and we have no intention of actually having fun during our undergraduate years.  But the thing is, we enjoy math.  And when you start a conversation with “I hate math” there’s really not anywhere for us to go from there, because it would sound really weird if we were like, “Oh yeah, me too.  Math sucks, that’s why it’s my major.”

So, please don’t compare me to your previous math teachers - I’m already concerned enough by the similarities I see in myself.  And please don’t say you hate math, it’s just a conversation killer.  Either joke about all the better majors I could have chosen or quickly move on to a new topic.  I for one would greatly appreciate it.